


The Past is Where My Heart Lives

by CrowKing



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Abused Loki, F/M, One Shot, Sad Loki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-26
Updated: 2019-06-26
Packaged: 2020-05-19 23:13:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19365670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrowKing/pseuds/CrowKing
Summary: Original request: Hey, I'm still recovering from Infinity War and Endgame and the lack of Loki. I was wondering if you could do a fic about Loki being forced to work for Thanos after Thor and him and Gamora promises to protect the space and soul stone respectively. Also Loki trying to plan to fail the invasion without making it look like it would be nice too





	The Past is Where My Heart Lives

He could smell his own burning flesh. The heat seared him. His screaming reached new high notes. It deafened his ears and when he finally opened his eyes, he realized he was in bed. 

Loki’s fingers twitched. He touched his chest to discover the new normal of his sleepwear being drenched in sweat. He sighed deeply and took off his shirt, letting the moonlight illuminate his torso. Asgard belonged to him now. Well, it belonged to Odin. 

But Odin was currently on Midgard under his spell. Loki ruled Asgard mostly undisturbed. He closed his eyes and remembered Thanos face. How he spoke so well, but the poisonous words would eventually penetrate him.

He didn’t remember much of the fall. Or the recovery afterwards. He does remember the heat chamber that Thanos and his children would throw him into. He remembers scratching at the door with every bit of strength he could muster as the heat gradually rose. His mouth ran dry and his vision became spotty.

Thanos would drag him out by his armor, laughing to himself. He must felt so good torturing a god. 

“Where is your brother now? He can’t save you here,” Thanos said.

“I don’t need him!” Loki responded back. He stared at the ground on his hands and knees. During his time here, his hair grew longer. Thanos grabbed some of it and pulled it back. He saw his good work. Loki’s red eyes fascinated Thanos in contrast to the blue spots of skin. 

“You want the world, young one?” Thanos teased. “I’ll give it to you if you give me something back.”

“No,” Loki said, meeting eyes with the larger man. “Everything you’ve done here will be fruitless. You have nothing.”

“I have the Tessaract,” Thanos corrected. “It’s yours if you give what I want.”

“What do you want?” Loki questioned. He watched Thanos smile, but not in an evil way. In a genuine way. Thanos’ honesty shocked Loki. His words chilled the boy to the bone.

“I want everything,” Thanos said.

For the next weeks, Loki would dress in full regalia while listening to Thanos and his children. That was their mistake. Loki collected their behaviors, their lies and truths, and their flaws. He remembered them in the back of his mind as Thanos threw him into the heat chamber again. As exhausted as the god would be after the torture sessions, Loki still had a sharp mind. 

He used it to find their weakest link.

“You know where it is,” Loki whispered to Gamora. She pinned him to the wall and growled.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said. Loki grabbed her arm and went into her memories. The soul stone’s location was still unknown to Thanos, but a new secret was kept between the two traitors.

“How did you—

“I am the God of Lies,” Loki said. “You can lie to everyone else here except for me. I always know.”

“Are you going to tell him?” Gamora gripped her favorite weapon at her side: the dagger. Loki brushed her fingers.

“No. Tell me what he’s planning. What does he want?”

“He told you everything. He wants to be the hero that saved us all.”

“The hero that saved us all?”

“He’s planning to collect all of the infinity stones. Once he does,” Gamora snapped her fingers in front of Loki. Loki glanced at her fingers and then back to her.

“Is there something I’m not understandi—

“If he has all of the stones and snaps his fingers, half of all life will be wiped out.”

“Half? Of all life?” Loki’s heart dropped. Thor. Frigga. You. “Is it—

“It’s random. He doesn’t decide who lives, who dies,” Gamora took Loki away from the hallway. She pulled him into a dark room. It wasn’t much significance save for the empty bed and basic furniture in the room. Gamora continued. “Thanos believes if he can wipe out half of all life, the world’s resources will be catered to the surviving half, making him a hero.”

“That’s insane. Why not double all of the world’s resources? Why take half of all life?”

“Because that’s all he knows.”

Silence fell between them both. It was not awkward, but out of fear. Each knew what the other had to do. Loki did as he was told and travelled to Midgard. His heat signature rose one of the highest its been. As Thor and his friends berated him and spat at him, Loki cheered them on. He knew he would lose. 

Gamora took Loki’s plan and made her own. She planned to live a normal life with her sister, Nebula. They could escape together while possessing one of the infinity stones. The location of the soul stone itched her mind as she watched Loki’s army fail miserably. She has underestimated the power of the Earthlings. 

They were strong. They were ready. They possessed a high number of the stones. 

“Come on, you idiot,” she muttered under her breath. Loki’s army would fall, destroying most of the violent alien race. He would escape with the space stone and both would go to The Collector to pawn them off. The sooner Loki disappeared with the stone, the sooner both of them would be separated from Thanos.

Gamora punched the wall of the space craft as she witnessed Loki being taken away, Tessaract in hand, by his brother. Their agreed plan had failed. Loki still won.

He was being taken home and away from all of this mess. Whatever lied ahead of him was better than the past that haunted him. As he was escorted into the dungeons, Thor said nothing to him. He never saw his mother.

But he did see you.

You were curious if the younger brother had survived just as the rumors said. Your big eyes and lady-in-waiting’s clothes told Loki everything he needed. You were safe. You were unmarried. And his heart still quietly belonged to you.

Loki heard tapping against Odin’s door. He smelled cinnamon, sugar, and vanilla in the air. It was you. No one else smelled like that at this time of night. He didn’t cast his glamour spell over himself and answered the door.

“Good evening, Lo—

Your eyes went wide. You had never seen your lord in this condition before. You and a select few of other close nobles knew that Loki was disguising himself as Odin. You preferred things this way. Seeing Loki answer the door did not shock you.

Seeing Loki answer the door, sweating and shirtless, shocked you.

“You had better come inside before anyone else sees, little lily,” Loki let you inside. You set down your tray of midnight baking goods. Cookies, scones, and other sweet breads wafted into Loki’s nose. He took a bite of a sweet bread. Cinnamon and sugar swirled in his mouth. 

He watched you sit quietly, watching the moonlight like he was watching you. Both of you were filled with a desire to touch the thing you watched.

“All of these late nights,” you said. “Do you ever wonder what it would be like to be something so beautiful? So bright?” Your eyes reflected in the moonlight. Loki could see the different shades of colors in your eyes.

“I wonder that every night,” Loki confessed. If he had to do it all over again, he wouldn’t change a thing. The world saw him as a terrible villainous, lying god. As long as you were safe and alive, none of that mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m not too happy with the story I wrote here. I would love some honest feedback on what I could’ve done better. I put a lot of spoons into this, but it is what it is.


End file.
